1 00:00:26,650 --> 00:00:28,720 Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. 2 00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:31,760 Someone had the brilliant idea 3 00:00:31,790 --> 00:00:36,100 that I should don this costume in order to dramatize the title 4 00:00:36,130 --> 00:00:37,670 of tonight’s play. 5 00:00:37,700 --> 00:00:40,900 It is called "The Horseplayer." 6 00:00:40,940 --> 00:00:43,000 Just a moment, you forgot something. 7 00:00:47,010 --> 00:00:51,980 I’m sure you want to know who authored this clever charade. 8 00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:54,420 His previous works include the following 9 00:00:54,450 --> 00:00:56,990 one-minute audio collage. 10 00:01:13,940 --> 00:01:15,470 -[priest] ...For the conversion of sinners... -[rain pouring] 11 00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:17,310 ...and for the liberty and exaltation 12 00:01:17,340 --> 00:01:19,110 of Holy Mother Church. 13 00:01:19,140 --> 00:01:22,110 St. Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, 14 00:01:22,140 --> 00:01:23,480 be our protection against the wickedness 15 00:01:23,510 --> 00:01:25,150 and snares of the devil. 16 00:01:25,180 --> 00:01:27,080 May God Rebuke him, we humbly pray, 17 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:28,920 and do Thou, Prince of the heavenly host, 18 00:01:28,950 --> 00:01:32,090 cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits 19 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:35,690 who wander through the world seeking the ruin of souls. 20 00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,090 -Amen. -Amen. 21 00:01:38,090 --> 00:01:39,890 [priest] The sacred heart of Jesus. 22 00:01:39,930 --> 00:01:41,130 [acolytes] Have mercy on us. 23 00:01:41,160 --> 00:01:43,160 Most sacred heart of Jesus. 24 00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:44,570 Have mercy on us. 25 00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:48,200 [priest] Most sacred heart of Jesus. 26 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:49,740 Have mercy on us. 27 00:01:58,450 --> 00:02:00,320 I have been asked to announce 28 00:02:00,350 --> 00:02:02,780 that the meeting of the mothers’ committee 29 00:02:02,820 --> 00:02:05,390 has been postponed until next Thursday. 30 00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:40,460 [knocking] 31 00:02:40,490 --> 00:02:42,820 [priest] Come in. 32 00:02:42,860 --> 00:02:44,860 Ah, Mr. Cheever. I was expecting you. 33 00:02:44,890 --> 00:02:47,430 Father Amion, I brought those figures 34 00:02:47,460 --> 00:02:48,760 we were talking about. 35 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:50,970 I’m afraid it’s not very good news. 36 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,900 You see, Father, it’s not just a matter 37 00:02:52,930 --> 00:02:54,600 of a few broken shingles. 38 00:02:56,300 --> 00:02:58,010 I could plug up one leak, all right, 39 00:02:58,110 --> 00:02:59,310 but another would just break out 40 00:02:59,340 --> 00:03:02,040 -someplace else. -Yes. I understand Mr. Cheever. 41 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:03,380 You’re gonna have to have a whole new set 42 00:03:03,410 --> 00:03:05,650 of drains, downspouts... 43 00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,320 I just can’t see it being managed 44 00:03:08,350 --> 00:03:10,420 for anything less than $1500. 45 00:03:10,450 --> 00:03:12,950 Well, I’m sure you’ve done your best. 46 00:03:13,050 --> 00:03:14,890 Unfortunately, Mr. Cheever, it seems 47 00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:16,860 that the church treasury has as many leaks 48 00:03:16,890 --> 00:03:18,060 as the church roof. 49 00:03:18,060 --> 00:03:21,060 We had so many repairs this year. 50 00:03:21,060 --> 00:03:22,830 But I have placed the facts before the bishop, 51 00:03:22,860 --> 00:03:25,930 and maybe he could work a minor miracle. 52 00:03:25,970 --> 00:03:28,300 Meanwhile, well, we can only hope 53 00:03:28,340 --> 00:03:30,470 for fair weather. 54 00:03:30,510 --> 00:03:31,740 I’m very sorry, Father. 55 00:03:31,770 --> 00:03:33,810 Thank you. Goodbye. 56 00:03:39,980 --> 00:03:41,280 [man] Oh, Father... 57 00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:43,220 would you take a look at this? 58 00:03:43,250 --> 00:03:44,790 What is it? 59 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,820 It’s a $10 bill, Father. 60 00:03:48,860 --> 00:03:50,830 And so it is. 61 00:03:50,860 --> 00:03:52,490 I don’t think I’ve seen a $10 bill 62 00:03:52,530 --> 00:03:55,500 in a mid-week collection since before the war. 63 00:03:55,530 --> 00:03:57,330 Did you see who the kind donor was? 64 00:03:57,370 --> 00:03:59,170 Oh, I couldn’t help noticing him, sir. 65 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:01,340 Even before he gave me his donation. 66 00:04:01,370 --> 00:04:03,470 He was in the first pew on the left. 67 00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:05,770 I don’t think he’s ever been at service before. 68 00:04:05,810 --> 00:04:08,040 What was so unusual about him? 69 00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:10,910 Well, he was sort of a rough-looking fellow, sir, 70 00:04:10,950 --> 00:04:13,950 uh... sort of sporty clothes. 71 00:04:14,050 --> 00:04:15,950 Oh, you mean the gentleman in the sport shirt? 72 00:04:16,050 --> 00:04:18,120 Oh, yes. I did see him. 73 00:04:18,150 --> 00:04:19,720 I don’t think it’s very charitable 74 00:04:19,750 --> 00:04:23,060 of you, Morton, to criticize his attire. 75 00:04:23,060 --> 00:04:25,060 Oh, I wasn’t criticizing him, sir, 76 00:04:25,060 --> 00:04:27,430 -especially after I saw his donation. -Huh? 77 00:04:27,460 --> 00:04:30,170 Well, I didn’t quite mean it like that, sir. 78 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:32,800 I understand how you feel. 79 00:04:32,830 --> 00:04:35,770 It does seem a shame that we should be so preoccupied 80 00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:37,140 with our expenses, 81 00:04:37,170 --> 00:04:39,910 but... I’m sure things will improve. 82 00:04:39,940 --> 00:04:41,080 Yes, Father. 83 00:04:41,110 --> 00:04:42,940 The Lord will provide. 84 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,420 [priest praying in Latin] 85 00:04:52,990 --> 00:04:54,660 Amen. 86 00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:03,370 Dominus vobiscum. 87 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,670 [acolytes] Et cum spiritu tuo. 88 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,040 Oremus. 89 00:05:28,260 --> 00:05:30,190 Orate Fratres. 90 00:05:44,840 --> 00:05:47,080 [whispering] 91 00:05:47,110 --> 00:05:48,340 May I speak with you for a moment? 92 00:05:48,380 --> 00:05:50,350 Huh? Oh, sure, Father. 93 00:05:50,380 --> 00:05:52,750 I’ve been wanting to talk to you for the past week. 94 00:05:52,780 --> 00:05:54,450 Oh, really? 95 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,190 By the way, I enjoyed your sermon very much, Father. 96 00:05:57,220 --> 00:05:58,850 Oh, I hope you realized that some of it 97 00:05:58,890 --> 00:06:00,220 was meant for you. 98 00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,520 I couldn’t help noticing how generous you’ve been 99 00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:04,330 to our poor church. 100 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:06,030 Are you new in the parish? 101 00:06:06,060 --> 00:06:07,860 Oh, no. I’ve been around this neighborhood 102 00:06:07,900 --> 00:06:09,600 over 20 years now, only, huh... 103 00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:10,770 you know, I ain’t never been much 104 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:11,900 for churches. 105 00:06:11,930 --> 00:06:13,300 In fact, the first time I came in here 106 00:06:13,340 --> 00:06:15,370 was about two weeks ago, 107 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,040 on a Tuesday. 108 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,740 Well, I’m certainly glad that you’ve changed your mind. 109 00:06:19,770 --> 00:06:21,680 Seems to me I’ve seen you here several times 110 00:06:21,710 --> 00:06:22,880 during the past two weeks 111 00:06:22,910 --> 00:06:23,910 Well, yeah. 112 00:06:23,950 --> 00:06:25,580 It’s OK, ain’t it, Father? 113 00:06:25,610 --> 00:06:27,380 I mean, you don’t mind, huh? 114 00:06:27,420 --> 00:06:29,220 Mind? 115 00:06:29,250 --> 00:06:30,720 Why should I mind? 116 00:06:30,750 --> 00:06:32,720 Well, I don’t know. 117 00:06:32,750 --> 00:06:34,120 By the way, my name is Sheridan, 118 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,090 and I-- I sure appreciate it, Father. 119 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:38,460 It’s meant an awful lot to me to come here to the church. 120 00:06:38,490 --> 00:06:39,790 Well, I’m glad. 121 00:06:39,830 --> 00:06:41,060 Yeah, I’m glad too, you see? 122 00:06:41,100 --> 00:06:42,300 When I saw that little sign of yours, 123 00:06:42,330 --> 00:06:43,730 you know the little sign you got outside, 124 00:06:43,770 --> 00:06:46,070 says "Try Prayer"? 125 00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:48,070 I says to myself, "Well, whatta you got to lose? 126 00:06:48,070 --> 00:06:50,770 You ain’t had no luck at nothing else, so... 127 00:06:50,810 --> 00:06:52,170 why not give this prayer thing a chance?" 128 00:06:52,210 --> 00:06:53,440 So I came in and tried it. 129 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,840 And did it help? 130 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,180 Oh, boy. I’ll say it helped. 131 00:06:57,210 --> 00:06:58,880 Well, it makes me very happy to hear you say so, 132 00:06:58,910 --> 00:07:00,020 -Mr. Sheridan. -Yeah. 133 00:07:00,050 --> 00:07:01,750 You won’t believe this, Father, 134 00:07:01,780 --> 00:07:04,020 but that day I had six winners out of eight. 135 00:07:04,050 --> 00:07:05,390 Six out of eight, and one of them was 136 00:07:05,420 --> 00:07:07,090 a 20-1 shot. 137 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:08,290 I’ve never had a day like that 138 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:10,230 since I’ve been going to the track. 139 00:07:10,260 --> 00:07:12,760 In fact, I was down to my last two bucks. 140 00:07:12,790 --> 00:07:13,930 Just a moment... 141 00:07:14,030 --> 00:07:16,430 I don’t understand what you mean. 142 00:07:16,460 --> 00:07:19,770 The track, Father, you know, the horses. 143 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:21,100 Look, I don’t want you to get sore. 144 00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:23,170 I suppose a guy like you, you probably don’t go in 145 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,340 for gambling and stuff like that, huh? 146 00:07:26,370 --> 00:07:28,040 You mean... 147 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:31,210 my sermon sent you to the race track? 148 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:33,150 Oh, no. I was gonna go anyhow, 149 00:07:33,180 --> 00:07:36,250 I go to the track all the time. That’s how I make my living. 150 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:38,190 You see, I used to be in the hardware business, 151 00:07:38,220 --> 00:07:39,790 but I got kind of tired of it, 152 00:07:39,820 --> 00:07:42,120 so, as I say, when I saw that sign of yours, 153 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,060 I says, "Why don’t we give it a whirl, Charlie? 154 00:07:44,090 --> 00:07:45,790 What have we got to lose?" 155 00:07:45,830 --> 00:07:48,260 So I started praying. 156 00:07:48,300 --> 00:07:50,330 Boy, how I prayed. 157 00:07:50,370 --> 00:07:53,300 "Give me a winner, please. Please, God, give me a winner." 158 00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:56,070 So what happened? I got six of ’em. 159 00:07:56,070 --> 00:07:58,770 And I’ve been picking ’em real good ever since. 160 00:07:58,810 --> 00:08:01,080 Mr. Sheridan, 161 00:08:01,110 --> 00:08:04,180 I don’t think you understood my message at all. 162 00:08:04,210 --> 00:08:06,110 I said that prayer could work miracles 163 00:08:06,150 --> 00:08:09,320 but not for such selfish aims. 164 00:08:09,350 --> 00:08:11,090 Well, it sure is a miracle, all right, Father? 165 00:08:11,120 --> 00:08:13,390 And believe me, I owe it all to you. 166 00:08:13,420 --> 00:08:15,020 There’s been a misunderstanding. 167 00:08:15,020 --> 00:08:17,030 You’ve made a mistake, Mr. Sheridan. 168 00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:19,830 Prayer isn’t intended for horse races. 169 00:08:19,860 --> 00:08:21,730 You can’t pray for your purse 170 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:23,160 and neglect your soul. 171 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,730 Oh. 172 00:08:24,770 --> 00:08:26,700 I thought you’d be sore. 173 00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:29,940 Oh, no. I’m not angry. Just look at it this way. 174 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:33,340 Now... suppose everyone at the track prayed 175 00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,040 for his horse to win. 176 00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:37,050 Now, you know that isn’t impossible, don’t you? 177 00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:39,310 So don’t you realize what a dilemma 178 00:08:39,350 --> 00:08:41,450 would be presented to the Lord? 179 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:43,420 Is that fair? 180 00:08:43,450 --> 00:08:44,720 Yeah, I never thought of it that way, 181 00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:46,120 I guess you are right. 182 00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:48,890 Then you do see the error of it? 183 00:08:48,920 --> 00:08:51,890 Well, yeah, it would be tough, 184 00:08:51,930 --> 00:08:53,960 that is if everybody prayed for a winner. 185 00:08:54,060 --> 00:08:55,800 Only they don’t, see? 186 00:08:55,830 --> 00:08:58,470 Everybody ain’t wise to this prayer racket, Father. 187 00:08:58,500 --> 00:09:00,670 And that’s their hard luck, ain’t it? 188 00:09:05,010 --> 00:09:05,910 [knocking] 189 00:09:06,010 --> 00:09:07,480 Come in. 190 00:09:09,910 --> 00:09:10,710 Father Amion. 191 00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:12,680 [Amion] Yes, Morton? 192 00:09:12,710 --> 00:09:14,850 That man, he’s back again. 193 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,750 I suppose you mean Mr. Sheridan. 194 00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:18,020 Yes, Father. 195 00:09:18,050 --> 00:09:20,890 As I passed his pew a few minutes ago, 196 00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,720 he kept saying something about Satan. 197 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:26,760 Satan? Oh, I don’t think you heard correctly, Morton. 198 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,060 Oh, yes I did, Father. 199 00:09:28,100 --> 00:09:31,030 He kept saying Satan... or... or devil, 200 00:09:31,030 --> 00:09:32,370 or something like that. 201 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:34,270 That’s it! Red Devil. 202 00:09:34,300 --> 00:09:36,100 He kept saying it over and over. 203 00:09:36,140 --> 00:09:38,140 I wouldn’t worry about it, Morton. 204 00:09:38,170 --> 00:09:41,180 Red Devil is undoubtedly the name of a horse. 205 00:09:41,210 --> 00:09:42,740 [knocking] 206 00:09:49,250 --> 00:09:51,720 Excuse me, could I see Father Amion for a minute? 207 00:09:51,750 --> 00:09:53,050 Come in, Mr. Sheridan. 208 00:09:55,260 --> 00:09:57,060 [mumbles] 209 00:09:57,090 --> 00:09:59,790 I hate to butt in on you like this, Father. 210 00:09:59,830 --> 00:10:01,160 I know you are a busy man. 211 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:02,960 That’s quite all right, Mr. Sheridan. 212 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:05,800 But I just came in to make a little donation. 213 00:10:05,830 --> 00:10:08,270 By the way, you know that roof of yours is leaking? 214 00:10:08,300 --> 00:10:10,970 I just got a shot of water right in the head. 215 00:10:11,010 --> 00:10:12,510 -I’m aware of it. -Well, 216 00:10:12,540 --> 00:10:14,010 anyway, as I was saying, 217 00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:16,480 I came in to donate these 30 bucks. 218 00:10:16,510 --> 00:10:18,210 You see, I was at the track yesterday, 219 00:10:18,250 --> 00:10:19,950 and I had a pretty good sized bet 220 00:10:19,980 --> 00:10:21,920 on a horse named Branding Iron. 221 00:10:21,950 --> 00:10:24,190 You know, one of the horses I was praying for? 222 00:10:24,220 --> 00:10:26,150 So as they lined up at the starting gate, 223 00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:28,220 I says to myself, "If branding Iron wins 224 00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:30,830 this race, I’m giving 30 bucks to the church." 225 00:10:30,860 --> 00:10:32,330 So there you are, Father. 226 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:34,130 He wins by seven lengths. 227 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:35,860 There is no need for you to tell me 228 00:10:35,900 --> 00:10:38,200 where your donation comes from, 229 00:10:38,230 --> 00:10:40,370 Mr. Sheridan. I thank you for it, 230 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,900 but I’d rather not discuss the source. 231 00:10:42,940 --> 00:10:45,010 Oh, you’re still mad at me, huh? 232 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,080 I was never mad at you. 233 00:10:47,110 --> 00:10:49,210 I’m praying for you, Mr. Sheridan. 234 00:10:49,240 --> 00:10:50,410 Oh, yeah? 235 00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:52,310 Boy! No I know I can’t miss. 236 00:10:52,350 --> 00:10:54,250 Oh, don’t misunderstand me. 237 00:10:54,280 --> 00:10:56,280 I’m praying for your soul, 238 00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:57,520 not your horses. 239 00:10:57,550 --> 00:10:59,390 Oh. 240 00:10:59,420 --> 00:11:01,360 Now, I don’t want you to think that I’m ungrateful. 241 00:11:01,390 --> 00:11:03,320 Frankly, as you know, our church is a poor one, 242 00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:06,290 and we can use any donations. 243 00:11:06,330 --> 00:11:08,060 You’ve been a great help 244 00:11:08,060 --> 00:11:10,130 and I appreciate it. 245 00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:12,730 You’re welcome, Father, and you deserve it. 246 00:11:12,770 --> 00:11:14,070 And if I have again anything special, 247 00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:16,070 you know, a horse that’s real hot 248 00:11:16,100 --> 00:11:18,110 and you’d like to put down a little money... 249 00:11:18,140 --> 00:11:19,740 Really, Mr. Sheridan! 250 00:11:19,770 --> 00:11:22,080 Wait a minute. 251 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:25,180 I think I got just the horse for you. 252 00:11:25,210 --> 00:11:27,880 Red Devil in the fourth race at Belmont. 253 00:11:27,920 --> 00:11:29,420 Do you mind if I use your phone a second? 254 00:11:29,450 --> 00:11:31,090 [Amion] Mr. Sheridan. 255 00:11:31,090 --> 00:11:32,850 Remember where you are. 256 00:11:32,890 --> 00:11:35,890 I’m sorry, Father, I only thought that-- 257 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:39,260 I have no wish to interfere with your way of life, 258 00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:42,130 and I certainly don’t want to be involved in it. 259 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:45,970 Our church will survive without race horses. 260 00:11:54,340 --> 00:11:56,750 [Amion] You take care of that cold, Mrs. Spencer. 261 00:11:56,780 --> 00:11:58,310 And tell your husband I’ll stop by 262 00:11:58,350 --> 00:11:59,810 to see him next week. 263 00:12:06,820 --> 00:12:08,160 [loud honking] 264 00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:19,900 Hi, Father, can I give you a lift? 265 00:12:19,930 --> 00:12:21,370 [Amion] No, thank you. 266 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:23,200 I’m only going a few blocks and I rather enjoy the walk. 267 00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:24,710 Oh. How do you like it? 268 00:12:24,740 --> 00:12:27,410 Brand new, and I don’t really even owe a nickel on it. 269 00:12:27,440 --> 00:12:29,080 It’s a very handsome vehicle. 270 00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:30,550 Yeah, thanks. 271 00:12:30,580 --> 00:12:31,950 Funny how these things work out, huh? 272 00:12:31,980 --> 00:12:33,420 You know, it was less than a month ago 273 00:12:33,450 --> 00:12:34,880 I only had two bucks to my name. 274 00:12:34,920 --> 00:12:36,580 [Amion] Remarkable. 275 00:12:36,620 --> 00:12:38,290 You know something, Father? 276 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:41,190 You know how many winners I had last week alone? 277 00:12:41,220 --> 00:12:42,560 No. 278 00:12:42,590 --> 00:12:43,690 [Sheridan] Fourteen out of eighteen. 279 00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:45,760 Seems every time I pray real hard 280 00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:48,800 for a horse, it turns out to be practically a sure thing. 281 00:12:50,570 --> 00:12:52,600 Say, Father, I couldn’t help but notice 282 00:12:52,630 --> 00:12:54,340 that roof of yours still needs fixing. 283 00:12:54,370 --> 00:12:57,370 You ain’t had no luck raising the dough, huh? 284 00:12:57,410 --> 00:12:59,770 Not for the moment, no. 285 00:12:59,810 --> 00:13:02,510 Well, look. I know how you feel about the races and all that, 286 00:13:02,540 --> 00:13:04,250 if you’ve got a few bucks to spare, 287 00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:05,780 there’s a horse going this afternoon 288 00:13:05,810 --> 00:13:06,820 named Sally’s Pal-- 289 00:13:06,850 --> 00:13:08,450 Mr. Sheridan, 290 00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:10,590 I thought we’d closed that subject. 291 00:13:10,620 --> 00:13:12,190 But just listen to me a minute, Father. 292 00:13:12,220 --> 00:13:13,390 Let me tell you about this horse. 293 00:13:13,420 --> 00:13:14,520 You see, they’ve been training him 294 00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:16,460 in secret, and I got it straight from the owners 295 00:13:16,490 --> 00:13:18,430 that the horse is absolutely ready. 296 00:13:18,460 --> 00:13:19,790 In fact, he busted the track record 297 00:13:19,830 --> 00:13:21,800 by over 2/5 of a second. 298 00:13:21,830 --> 00:13:23,830 Not only once, but a couple of times. 299 00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:26,270 This afternoon he’s starting in his first big race, 300 00:13:26,300 --> 00:13:27,540 and all he’s got against him 301 00:13:27,570 --> 00:13:29,440 is a bunch of broken down fillies, well... 302 00:13:29,470 --> 00:13:30,770 I don’t have to tell you, Father, 303 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:34,310 you know how colts run away from fillies. 304 00:13:34,340 --> 00:13:36,080 I know nothing of the kind. 305 00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:37,280 Well, take my word for it, Father, 306 00:13:37,310 --> 00:13:38,710 they run like burglars. 307 00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:40,520 And according to the morning-line, 308 00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:42,320 the horse had a pay of about 15-1, 309 00:13:42,350 --> 00:13:43,620 probably even more than that. 310 00:13:43,650 --> 00:13:45,390 So it looks like a pretty good spot for you 311 00:13:45,420 --> 00:13:46,960 to pick up a fast buck. 312 00:13:46,990 --> 00:13:49,190 And if I really start praying-- 313 00:13:49,220 --> 00:13:51,430 I’m afraid I have to go, Mr. Sheridan. 314 00:13:51,460 --> 00:13:54,200 I have a church council meeting this morning. 315 00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:55,860 Oh, well, it’s up to you, Father. 316 00:13:55,900 --> 00:13:58,230 All I know is I’m putting my last buck on this horse, 317 00:13:58,270 --> 00:13:59,430 right on the nose, 318 00:13:59,470 --> 00:14:01,570 so if everything goes all right, 319 00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:04,410 I probably won’t be seeing you around no more. 320 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:05,510 Why is that? 321 00:14:05,540 --> 00:14:06,740 Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you 322 00:14:06,780 --> 00:14:08,640 I’m buying me a place down in Florida, 323 00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:10,380 got a wonderful location, right between 324 00:14:10,410 --> 00:14:12,310 a catholic church and Hialeah. 325 00:14:12,350 --> 00:14:14,680 Well, I wish you the best of luck, Mr. Sheridan. 326 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:15,750 I really do. 327 00:14:15,780 --> 00:14:17,050 [Sheridan] Thank you, Father. 328 00:14:22,590 --> 00:14:24,560 Uh... Mr. Sheridan, you are really sure 329 00:14:24,590 --> 00:14:25,930 of this horse, aren’t you? 330 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:27,860 Oh, sure, I’m absolutely positive, Father. 331 00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,160 You know, like I told you, 332 00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:30,970 I’ve been praying real hard all week. 333 00:14:31,070 --> 00:14:33,940 Plus, which I know the horse has got the stuff. 334 00:14:33,970 --> 00:14:40,540 If-- If someone bet $500 on this horse, 335 00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:42,580 what might he expect to win? 336 00:14:42,610 --> 00:14:44,350 Well, let me see. 337 00:14:44,380 --> 00:14:47,480 Let’s just say worse comes to worse and the horse only pays ten bucks, 338 00:14:47,520 --> 00:14:50,590 the least a guy could pick up would be about $2500. 339 00:14:51,650 --> 00:14:53,790 $2500. 340 00:14:53,820 --> 00:14:55,560 [Sheridan] Mm-hmm. 341 00:14:55,590 --> 00:15:00,860 Mr. Sheridan, if I were to give you $500, 342 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:04,300 could you... arrange this... 343 00:15:04,330 --> 00:15:06,330 transaction for me? 344 00:15:06,370 --> 00:15:07,800 You mean it, Father? 345 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,870 [Amion] Would you? 346 00:15:09,900 --> 00:15:11,410 Well, sure, I’d be glad to. 347 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:14,210 You know, you do unto me, I do unto you. 348 00:15:52,310 --> 00:15:54,150 -Good morning, Father. -Good morning. 349 00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,260 Closing out your savings account? 350 00:16:00,290 --> 00:16:01,260 Yes. 351 00:16:01,290 --> 00:16:03,320 -Anything wrong, Father? -Nothing wrong. 352 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,230 Our service has been satisfactory, 353 00:16:05,260 --> 00:16:06,260 hasn’t it? 354 00:16:06,290 --> 00:16:07,830 Very satisfactory. 355 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:15,700 How would you like the money, Father? 356 00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,240 Doesn’t matter. 357 00:16:17,270 --> 00:16:19,770 Oh, put it in large bills, please. 358 00:16:19,810 --> 00:16:20,910 [banker] Fifties? 359 00:16:20,940 --> 00:16:22,210 That will do it. 360 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:36,320 Thank you. 361 00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:37,930 [banker] Thank you, Father. 362 00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:57,950 [Sheridan] OK, Father. 363 00:16:57,980 --> 00:16:59,910 Good luck to us. 364 00:17:12,330 --> 00:17:15,200 I don’t know what came over me, Your Excellency. 365 00:17:15,230 --> 00:17:16,730 I’ve never done such a thing before. 366 00:17:16,770 --> 00:17:18,670 Now, now, Father. 367 00:17:18,700 --> 00:17:20,570 I find it hard to believe you could have done anything 368 00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:21,740 really wrong. 369 00:17:21,770 --> 00:17:23,670 The moment I did it, I regretted it. 370 00:17:23,710 --> 00:17:25,540 If I could have found the man, I would have stopped him, 371 00:17:25,570 --> 00:17:27,440 but I don’t even know where to reach him. 372 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:28,880 Please, Father. 373 00:17:28,910 --> 00:17:30,310 How can I help you if I don’t know 374 00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:32,510 what it is you’ve done? 375 00:17:32,550 --> 00:17:35,520 Your Excellency... 376 00:17:35,550 --> 00:17:37,220 I bet money on a horse. 377 00:17:37,250 --> 00:17:39,420 I see. 378 00:17:39,450 --> 00:17:42,260 And just how much money did you bet? 379 00:17:42,290 --> 00:17:43,460 All I had. 380 00:17:43,490 --> 00:17:45,390 $500. I went to the bank and closed out 381 00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:47,060 my savings account. 382 00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:50,570 Well... 383 00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:54,300 that is something to be concerned about. 384 00:17:54,340 --> 00:17:56,910 Whatever possessed you, Father? 385 00:17:56,940 --> 00:18:00,710 You were never a gambling man, nor did you ever care much about money. 386 00:18:00,740 --> 00:18:02,880 I don’t care about the savings. 387 00:18:02,910 --> 00:18:04,710 I just hope that I’d make enough money 388 00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:08,580 to pay for the roof repairs we’ve needed for so long. 389 00:18:08,620 --> 00:18:10,120 I see. 390 00:18:10,150 --> 00:18:12,490 I shall never forgive myself for what I did. 391 00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:14,120 I shall never understand why I did it. 392 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:15,560 The man I gave the money to, 393 00:18:15,590 --> 00:18:16,930 he seemed so sure of himself, 394 00:18:17,030 --> 00:18:18,860 so successful. 395 00:18:18,890 --> 00:18:22,130 Help me to understand what I’ve done. 396 00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:23,400 Help me. 397 00:18:23,430 --> 00:18:26,600 Help me, please, to explain it to myself. 398 00:18:27,770 --> 00:18:29,700 Yes. 399 00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:36,640 I find it hard to believe, Father. 400 00:18:38,580 --> 00:18:40,480 If I didn’t know you better, 401 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:42,550 if you were a young man, 402 00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:45,420 I might understand such rashness. 403 00:18:45,450 --> 00:18:47,560 But it’s 40 years, 404 00:18:47,590 --> 00:18:50,330 40 years since you took your vows. 405 00:18:50,360 --> 00:18:53,330 And to do such a-- such a-- 406 00:18:53,360 --> 00:18:55,700 such a foolhardy thing. 407 00:18:55,730 --> 00:19:01,000 I know, I know. Please, tell me what must I do? 408 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,000 [bishop] You say... 409 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,740 you don’t know how to find this man 410 00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:07,140 to whom you gave the money. 411 00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:08,610 [Amion] No. 412 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:11,150 So there’s no way of preventing this bet 413 00:19:11,180 --> 00:19:12,880 from being made? 414 00:19:12,910 --> 00:19:13,850 No. 415 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,850 There isn’t. 416 00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:20,220 You see... the race is this afternoon. 417 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:25,430 Then... there’s only one thing to be done. 418 00:19:25,460 --> 00:19:27,530 Only one way to make restitution. 419 00:19:28,730 --> 00:19:30,600 And that is? 420 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:34,370 You must pray, Father. 421 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:37,410 You must pray as you have never prayed before. 422 00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:39,740 And I’ll add my prayers to yours. 423 00:19:39,770 --> 00:19:43,650 You must pray for that horse not to win. 424 00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:46,080 -Not to win? -Yes. 425 00:19:46,110 --> 00:19:48,650 You can’t expect a reward for your error, 426 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,190 no matter what the consequences. 427 00:19:51,220 --> 00:19:53,590 I can see no other expiation, 428 00:19:53,620 --> 00:19:56,830 except to ask the Lord to withhold this victory. 429 00:19:56,860 --> 00:20:00,430 You must pray for this with all your might. 430 00:20:00,460 --> 00:20:01,930 But the money, Your Excellency, 431 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,430 we’re in such need now. 432 00:20:04,470 --> 00:20:06,430 The money does not matter. 433 00:20:14,340 --> 00:20:16,410 You are right, of course. 434 00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:20,180 I’ll do as you say, Your Excellency. 435 00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:22,850 We must pray that the horse... 436 00:20:22,880 --> 00:20:24,820 won’t win. 437 00:20:30,390 --> 00:20:32,190 [Amion praying in Latin] 438 00:20:33,930 --> 00:20:36,670 Soul of Christ be my sanctification. 439 00:20:36,700 --> 00:20:39,230 Body of Christ, be my salvation. 440 00:20:39,270 --> 00:20:41,270 Grant me, oh, Lord, this wish I ask 441 00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:43,340 in sorrow and repentance. 442 00:20:43,370 --> 00:20:44,540 Amen. 443 00:20:54,020 --> 00:20:55,480 Father Amion. 444 00:20:57,020 --> 00:20:58,820 [Amion] Yes, Morton? 445 00:20:58,850 --> 00:21:00,420 Look, he’s back. 446 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:24,680 It’s all right, my son. 447 00:21:24,710 --> 00:21:26,680 I understand. 448 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:28,250 You understand what? 449 00:21:28,280 --> 00:21:29,920 About the race this afternoon. 450 00:21:29,950 --> 00:21:31,890 You’ve just returned? 451 00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:35,320 Yeah, I just got back a little while ago. 452 00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:38,430 And, uh... this horse, this... 453 00:21:38,460 --> 00:21:40,900 Sally’s Pal, it didn’t win? 454 00:21:40,930 --> 00:21:43,770 No, it dud. 455 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,900 Well, now, I don’t want you to blame yourself. 456 00:21:46,940 --> 00:21:50,240 You were trying to do good in your own fashion. 457 00:21:50,270 --> 00:21:54,310 Whatever blame there is must fall on my shoulders. 458 00:21:54,340 --> 00:21:55,610 [Sheridan] I just don’t understand it, though, 459 00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:57,110 Father, you know, it was a sure thing 460 00:21:57,110 --> 00:21:58,780 if I ever saw one. 461 00:21:58,810 --> 00:22:00,620 At the head of the stretch he’s leading by four lengths. 462 00:22:00,650 --> 00:22:03,050 Then all of the sudden, he quits on me. 463 00:22:03,050 --> 00:22:04,920 I just don’t understand it. 464 00:22:04,950 --> 00:22:08,390 Sure thing like that, and he quits. 465 00:22:08,420 --> 00:22:10,360 Trouble is I had my last nickel bet on him, 466 00:22:10,390 --> 00:22:11,860 right on the nose, so... 467 00:22:11,890 --> 00:22:13,900 now I’m back just where I started 468 00:22:13,930 --> 00:22:16,800 from what, two buck on my pocket. 469 00:22:16,830 --> 00:22:19,070 I think maybe I ought to go back in the hardware business. 470 00:22:19,100 --> 00:22:20,440 What do you think, Father? 471 00:22:20,470 --> 00:22:22,540 I think it’s a very good idea. 472 00:22:22,570 --> 00:22:24,910 Yeah. I think so too. 473 00:22:24,940 --> 00:22:28,080 Well... anyway, here’s your money. 474 00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:35,720 My money? 475 00:22:35,750 --> 00:22:37,390 [Sheridan] Well, yeah. 476 00:22:37,420 --> 00:22:38,820 You don’t think I was gonna risk your dough 477 00:22:38,850 --> 00:22:40,560 on a win bet, did you? 478 00:22:40,590 --> 00:22:42,760 I took the $500 and I bet him to place, 479 00:22:42,790 --> 00:22:44,890 so he came in second and paid eight dollars 480 00:22:44,930 --> 00:22:46,630 and forty cents, so... 481 00:22:46,660 --> 00:22:50,470 there you are, it’s, uh, $2100 you won. 482 00:23:35,710 --> 00:23:39,350 The sponsor is being unusually difficult 483 00:23:39,380 --> 00:23:43,080 about this matter of the horse costume. 484 00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:46,090 I’ve explained the labor-saving advantages 485 00:23:46,090 --> 00:23:51,090 of employing a real horse to do the work of two men, 486 00:23:51,090 --> 00:23:54,900 but he is so enchanted with this pun of his, 487 00:23:54,930 --> 00:23:57,100 on the word "horseplayer," 488 00:23:57,130 --> 00:24:00,140 that he insists on having it out with me. 489 00:24:00,170 --> 00:24:02,300 I shall be back shortly. 490 00:24:02,340 --> 00:24:05,340 It will only take a minute to put him in his place.